Exclusive: Transcript of President's secret meeting with House Republicans to avoid the dreaded Sequester

This.

A man becomes president...

...he's expected to have...

...enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms!

Enthusiasms.

What are mine?

What draws my admiration?

What is that which gives me joy?

Spending!

A president stands alone in the White House.

This is the time for what?

Individual achievement!!

There he stands alone.

But the House of Representatives, the Senate, the SEIU, Planned Parenthood... Part. Of. A. Team.

...uhm, teamwork... ehm... teamwork...

Grows the government!

Part of one... big... team!

Works for the collective good, the people, all the live-long day...

...Ayers, Hoffa...

...Alinsky...

...and so on.

If his team don't organize... help the government continue to spend...

What is he?

You follow me?

No one.

...

*** THWAKK!!! ***

*** THWAKK!!! ***

*** THWAKK!!! ***

You got that, Boehner?

You got that?

Get someone to clean this s*** up, Carney.

And find out what time we're teeing off tomorrow while you're at it.