Sloooooooow Joe Biden

Picture credit: US Senate
Let's, for just a moment, examine one of the most bizarre speeches I've ever heard. The speech was given by Slow Joe Biden, the serial obstructionist. Biden's latest strawmen are assembled in this doozy of a speech, which he gave Friday at the American Constitution Society national convention (a big hat tip to RadioBlogger). His goal? To spread fear, uncertainty and doubt regarding the GOP agenda, including the confirmation of one John D. Roberts, nominee to the Supreme Court.

Here are some of Biden's brain droppings:

...the Constitutional exile crowd... believes not just that privacy rights should be diminished, it's members believe that there should be none. I repeat that. No general right of privacy whatsoever... the government, whether state, federal or local, could forbid couples as they had in the past, from using contraception.

That's the term the GOP prefers: the "Constitutional Exile Crowd." Conservative plans are in motion, their forces are gathering, and powers -- the likes of which Joe Biden cannot possibly understand -- are assembling... all with one single-minded mission: to confiscate every condom from every Walgreens in the land. Muuuhhawhawhawhawhaw!

Privacy? We don't need no steenkin' privacy! Even now, legislation is being drafted that will require webcams in every room of every residence in the US. The only question I have is: how did Biden find out?

...The government could also Constitutionally impose restrictions on the number of children you have, a bizarre notion. It exists in other countries, and God only knows what happens here in two, five, ten, twenty, thirty years...

Yes, it's sad but true. Diabolical uberman, Karl Rove, and the rest of the administration is working on exactly that... legislation to restrict the right of married couples (married, heterosexual couples, at that) to have but two children. Any additional children must be ceded to Halliburton. And, yes, the GOP has cued up John Roberts as the swing vote on any appeal.

...Will the government have unlimited power to monitor individuals, like I'm being monitored now?

I do have a solution. Simply place a tinfoil hat on your head, Mr. Biden. That wafer-thin layer of aluminum will completely block the frequency, Kenneth. And just ignore the curious looks you'll get from those around you. That's the price one pays for being a rebel. Or a serial obstructionist.

If Biden slides any further into the realm of Leftist fantasy, he'll be consigned to riding in the vegetable-powered bus with Jane Fonda and the rest of the moonbats. One can only hope that the transcript of this bizarre speech is circulated far and wide, so that all Americans can bask in the intellectual sun-lamp known as Joe Biden (and his teeth). After all, this is one of the Democratic front-runners in '08.

Just sit back and consider that for a moment.

We're Slashing the Price of Strawmen at Crazy Joe's

What the...?

The book Endgame (subtitled, "The Blueprint for Victory in the War on Terror") contains some fascinating snippets, but none more intriguing than this:

...a group of countries, led by Israel and the U.S., had been working since 1981 on a mega-secret project to develop and deploy a weapon system that can neutralize nuclear weapons. The highly advanced, space-deployable, BHB weapon system, code-named XXXBHB-BACAR-1318-I390MSCH, has extraordinary potential and is a key part of the West's deterrence strategy. For the past twenty-five years, the project and the scientists involved in it were kept in strict secrecy and their existence denied. The scientists rejected Nobel Physics prize and Nobel Peace prize nominations and have been repeatedly and deliberately the subject of intense military disinformation through the media in order to divert attention from their highly secretive work. In 1981, when CIA director William J. Casey signed onto the SDI (Strategic Defense Initiative) - a missile defense shield against incoming nuclear warheads - he gave the green light for the technology's development for deterrence purposes and peaceful use only. Although we have only limited information, it appears that Iran's rapidly developing nuclear capabilities could be neutralized and rendered obsolete, as could the capabilities of other rogue countries...

From the authors' lips to God's ear.

Ultimatum: Cooperate or face the consequences

Congressional Election: GOP Wins - Barely

Picture credit: WikiPedia
The Dems pulled out all the stops in Ohio and, once again, couldn't close the deal. The opportunity arrived because President Bush had appointed Republican Rob Portman as U.S. Trade Representative. Thus, a rare, off-year election yesterday pitted Jean Schmidt against Democratic contender Paul Hackett.

Paul Hackett (WikiPedia)

The Dems truly didn't play around this time. They had hoped to pull off a major upset by aligning every factor in their favor:

- Hackett is a former U.S. Marine (and trial lawyer), but claims opposition to the war
- Hackett featured... yes... President Bush in his ads
- Hackett looks like a male model
- Schmidt had been tied to the unpopular Governor, Bob Taft, who is enduring his own personal scandals at the moment
- Voter turnout would be light in an off-year race
- Hackett received enough campaign money to essentially match Schmidt ad-for-ad

The race reminds me of nothing less than a snippet of conversation from the television show Cheers:

"What'll you have Normie?" "Well, I'm in a gambling mood Sammy. I'll take a glass of whatever comes out of that tap." "Looks like beer, Norm." "Call me Mister Lucky."

The citizens coming out of the tap will continue to vote Republican for the foreseeable future. That is, until the Democrats excise the cancerous MoveOn, Michael Moore, and Hollywood Left from the party. Not only does that Left Bank represent damaged goods, they don't even think we're at war.

Michael Moore speaks for the Democrats' Left Bank when he says, "There is no terrorist threat. There is no terrorist threat."

As does Juan Cole, who flatly states, "It is not a war."

I question either their judgment - or their loyalty. I can come to no other conclusion. The Left Bank is either intellectually bankrupt... or their patriotism lies with another land. In any case, they won't be winning many elections for the foreseeable future.

Space - the Final Frontier

Picture credit: http://www.segginger.net
The invaluable James Taranto notes a "back to the future" moment:

From "The Trouble With Tribbles," a "Star Trek" episode that first aired Dec. 29, 1967:

Klingon: Of course I'd say that Captain Kirk deserves his ship. We like the Enterprise; we--we really do. That sagging, old rust bucket is designed like a garbage scow. Half the quadrant knows it. That's why they're learning to speak Klingonese.

Chekov: Mr. Scott!

Scotty: Laddie, don't ya think ya should--rephrase that?

Klingon: You're right. I should. I didn't mean to say that the Enterprise should be hauling garbage. I meant to say that it should be hauled away as garbage!

Steve Chapman in the Chicago Tribune, July 31, 2005:

The little-known secret of the shuttle is that it's an airborne moving van, whose main role is to haul parts, supplies and other cargo to the International Space Station. Among the tasks assigned to the astronauts on Discovery is picking up the space station's garbage. . . . Maybe NASA needs to scrap the shuttle.

We're Slashing the Price of Strawmen at Crazy Joe's!

John Roberts (PBS)
If you're looking for a patron saint of obstructionists, look no further than "Slow Joe" Biden. Gearing up for the Supreme Court nomination process, Biden is out to get as much face time as possible, no matter how embarrassing the venue or his remarks. In a speech yesterday, Biden discussed a government that would limit the number of children a family could have and might outlaw all stem-cell research. The implication, of course, is that these are directions in which John Roberts might guide the court.

And, no, I don't think he was drunk, though he was doing a passable imitation.

These strawmen simply represent the advance scouts of the Democratic offensive. Raise strawman after strawman and let the nominee waste time hurdling useless calumny.

Biden, of course, is on the Senate Judiciary Committee. His goal is simple: to get as much camera time as possible during the confirmation process, thereby thwarting Hillary's 2008 advance publicity campaign.

And he obviously has no shame. In 2003, Biden supported Roberts' nomination to District of Columbia Circuit Court of Appeals. Does the word hypocrite come to mind?

Do me a favor and ook up plagiarism in the dictionary. You get... Joe Biden. No, I'm not kidding. Webster's Online Dictionary defines plagiarism using several famous examples including:

...Senator Joseph Biden was forced to withdraw from the 1988 Democratic Presidential nominations when it was revealed he had failed a course in law school due to plagiarism. It was also shown that he had plagiarised several campaign speeches, notably those of British Labour leader Neil Kinnock and Senator Robert F. Kennedy...

If Biden had an ounce of dignity, he'd have resigned his Senate seat then and returned in disgrace to his home state. Instead, he's hung around for a couple of decades, dispensing obstructionist rhetoric as a MassPort truck dumps road salt during a snow storm.

Consider the John Bolton nomination, the vote for which was hamstrung by a litany of document requests and procedural rigamarole led by Biden and Chris Dodd. What egregious crime had Bolton committed? Nothing so serious as Biden's admitted plagiarism, that much is certain:

No wild accusation was ever proved, other than that he sought the removal of two intelligence analysts for incompetence and insubordination. Notably, both the 9/11 Commission and Robb-Silberman Commission said policy makers have a responsibility to question and challenge intelligence analysts.

That's the extent of Bolton's crimes. He sought to have a couple of analysts removed, which at least two bipartisan commissions have characterized as a perfectly legitimate practice.

Once the issue of analysts had been resolved, Biden and friends resorted to shell game of procedural requests. Biden's money quote?

I would consider the failure to produce the requested documents in a timely manner a lack of cooperation.

It's another case of moving goalposts, one of the Democrats' favorite games. Obstructionism didn't work for Tom Daschle, he of the recent ex-communication. And it won't work for the next series of Democratic leaders either.

Just don't count on Biden coming to grips with that anytime soon. Fact is, there's no disputing Biden's nickname in the blogosphere. "Slow Joe" Biden is a name that will live in infamy, wherever and whenever obstructionism raises its ugly head. Fortunately, Biden and his vast intellect are no more likely to get the Democratic nod in '08 than is Jessica Simpson. Slow Joe just doesn't know it yet, which is pretty much par for the course.

Recruiting at Defcon

Picture credit: http://www.1000misspenthours.com
The News.com security blog reports that the Department of Defense is hiring. In fact, the director of the DOD's Cybercrime Center has already attended eight Defcon conventions. His goal: hire 21 people for the Center:

The cybercrime center aids in the investigation of cybercrimes by training law enforcement agents, running a forensics lab and developing tools for investigations. Christy is looking for electrical and computer engineers and programmers, among other people. He might fight some of those people at Defcon, he said.

And they have a good sense of humor:

On Saturday Christy and representatives from other federal agencies hosted a "Meet the Fed" session at Defcon. They pulled an old prank. First, all attendees were asked to stand. Then everyone who had not hacked into any system illegitimately was asked to sit down. The Feds then pulled out cameras and started snapping pictures.

Hiring at Defcon is a great idea. By definition, the attendees are captivated by computer security. And that's exactly the sort of person every employer wants to hire: someone energized about their job and who looks forward to a new, complex and different challenge every day.

News.com security blog

Steyn: Wake up, Folks -- It's War!

Picture credit: http://www.c-spanarchives.org/
The Genius (need I even say the name 'Mark Steyn'?) weighs in at the Spectator with an invocation not unlike that which sallied forth from this channel but a few days ago. To wit: it's a war, folks. The knuckleheads who fail to understand this simple, vetted concept are going to get a lot more innocent people killed.

...Madrid and London - along with other events such as the murder of Theo Van Gogh - are, in essence, the opening shots of a European civil war. You can laugh at that if you wish, but the Islamists’ most often-stated goal is not infidel withdrawal from Iraq but the re-establishment of a Muslim caliphate living under Sharia that extends to Europe; and there’s a lot to be said for taking these chaps at their word and then seeing whether their behaviour is consistent. Furthermore, there’s a lot more of the world that lives under Sharia than there was, say, 30 years ago: Pakistan adopted it in 1977, Iran in 1979, Sudan in 1984.... Fifty years ago, Nigeria lived under English common law; now, half of it’s in the grip of Islamic law. So, as a political project, radical Islam has made some headway, and continues to do so almost every day of the week: since the beginning of the year, for example, some 10 per cent of southern Thailand’s Buddhist population have abandoned their homes - a far bigger disruption than the tsunami, yet all but unreported in the Western press. And whatever one’s opinion of the various local conflicts around the world - Muslims vs Buddhists in Thailand, Muslims vs Hindus in Kashmir, Muslims vs Jews in the Holy Land, Muslims vs Russians in Chechnya, Muslims vs Christians in Africa - the fact is that the jihad has held out a long time against very tough enemies...

Mark Steyn: Wake up, folks - it’s war!