Grandma's Got a Gun

Papa B has an idea for a new entitlement program.

You're a sick senior citizen and the government says there is no nursing home available for you. So what do you do?

Our plan offers anyone 65 years or older a revolver (no ammunition needed). We teach you how to carjack, rob passers-by, burglarize residences, and otherwise commit heinous crimes.

Of course, this means that you will be sent to prison where you will get three meals a day, a roof over your head, central heating, air conditioning and all the health care you need!

Need new teeth? No problem. Glasses? That's great. Need a new hip, knees, kidney, lungs or heart? They're all covered.

As an added bonus, your kids can come and visit you as often as they do now.

And who will be paying for all of this? It's the same government that just told you that you they cannot afford for you to go into a nursing home.

Plus, because you are a prisoner, you don't have to pay any income taxes anymore.